Bigger is definitely better
WOMBAT:
Size is important in pussies too. Me, I'm a fan of big cooters, and the reasons for that choice are pretty simple.
Starting out in the world of the carnal arts, a youngster is less than discriminating. He'll insert his Tab A into any old available Slot B, irrespective of its size or shape. Once the excitement of first sex has worn off, a man starts to refine his quim, to listen to the inner voice, to align his taste with his soul. It's a grand day when a guy is so confident of what he wants that he can say to a naked woman;
Honey, you're beautiful and sexy, but I need a bigger box.
Look, I've been with women with porn-star pussies, and with women sporting pussies so tight it's like re-corking a champagne bottle. Snug pussies are great, and persnickity pussies are charming. There isn't a pussy yet that I haven't fallen in love with. It's just that I truly dig the ones I could fall into.
Making love is a spiritual and mental pursuit, and being intimate with a large pussy allows my thinking to expand commensurately. It gives the imagination some room to manoeuvre. Then there is the issue of friction. Friction, in case you didn't know, is what causes pleasurable sensations in the penis. It's also what leads us to topple our gyros, lose control and ejaculate. I submit that with a roomier pussy, friction is minimized, and pleasure-time maximized. Hours and hours of it.
As with everything, there are small negatives. One is that if the woman's velvet love trench is very large, she might ask "Are you in yet honey?" no matter how large one's donger. Another is the possibility of Pussy Echo Syndrome, which occurs when affording the lady oral pleasure and a few words come out...and return to you as an echo. I can tell you, it's bloody frightening to think there's another guy lost in there, until you realize it's your own voice.
Please don't take me the wrong way. I adore all of you with economical tighties; bigger is simply my personal choice. Let's put it this way, why should I drive a Prius, when I prefer a Hummer?
Thanks to Kerry for introducing me to "cooter". I didn't know of the term until she used it in comments yesterday, and instantly fell in love.
Tagged: I love Cooters, Velvet love trench, Pussy Echo Syndrome
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21 comments:
Sometimes you have to drive the hummer with the doors open, for fear of falling in. I understand your reasoning for the big 'Cooter' (may I use that too :)) but I still like the snugger fit...although the friction can cause an early demise if not paced...the second time round however they have usually materialised into the larger model with less friction and more velvet. It truely is a wonderous thing
"Little creatures of the Closet of Insecurities, meet Pussy Size, your new roommate. Pussy Size, welcome to your new home..."
"woman's velvet love trench" is the best term I've ever heard.
HI-larious.
Ditto on the velvet love trench term. I'm still giggling.
The way you evaluate body parts, (and explain your preferences,) is informative, scary and an absolute riot.
And stop making me giggle at work ok? You're getting me in trouble damn it!
Best of luck in your search.
My personal favorite is "fluffy sausage wallet", or FSW for short.
lol i love you wombat
Given the Hummer analogy I'm guessing you're trying to fit a .50 cal in there?
"velvet love trench"
now THAT is a new one to me.
you don't hear guys saying i want a big pussy very often. you're such a trendsetter dear.
:) sizz
W-
All of us with the tight little flowers and you want the big 'uns... ummm... gross.
If you have a problem losing your wad prematurely then I believe that would be your problem, not the trench in which you are attempting to lay your pipe.
OCG
I needed that laugh, and I can tell you now that ROFL, LMAO and all that jazz just doesn't begin to describe my mirth. Wombat, your writing is superb!
Funny thing: I heard this song called Broken Box in The Boyfriend's car the other day, and now I can't get it out of my head.
Quite possibly he is sporting a grenade launcher in his trousers.
Scorpy - the "cooter" is a wonderful velvety thing; please use it freely. (As if it's mine to give away.)
Cinn - I might just be hypothesizing you know.
Kelly - the VLT is the best thing I've ever come across too.
Sandy - glad to make you giggle, Miss Dee.
LisaB - thanks for your good wishes. If you get detention for laughing at work, just blame me.
Anon - FSW eh? Cute, I'll store that one away.
Why Blush, I'm blushing.
Dusty - I totally broke up at that. V funny.
Sizz - just stick with me, hun, you'll always be ahead of the pack.
OCG - which reminds me of the joke about the woman, who, upon spying her new lover's tiny penis for the first time asks:
Who are you planning to please with that cashew?
To which he replies: Me.
Happy acronyms back to you, N, glad to have brightened your day. Broken box gone-a-rear perhaps?
Loghyr - a comment to which I can think of no smart response, but thanks!
Wombat
because Hummers hog the road? guzzle gas? Have an ad campaign that is primarily based on the concept of bullying?
And most importantly, cut me off, like tonight in traffic?
*I apologize, I'm clearly bitter this evening*
Wombat - seeks single mothers.
Those Hummers are vindictive, Meg, they'll cut you off as soon as give you the time of day. I guess your town car and driver were off last night.
Funny, it had crossed my mind too, Callisto.
Wombat
hmmmmm...does this mean I can ease up on the kegals?
heehee...reminds me of Stewie Griffin's question from Family guy: "So, is there any tread left on the tires? Or at this point would it be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway? "
Evilchick - oh, those damn pelvic floor exercises are ruining my fun. Kegal schmegal.
Hot dog down a hallway! Love it!
Wombat
In Cork, Ireland, there's a saying.
"It was like throwing a sausage down Pana"
Pana= Patrick's Street, Cork City's biggest, widest road! :D
WOW! This brings back some memories. In high school I spent at least an hour trying to fit inside a one night stand. I never made it. Years later, I dated a small framed woman and LOVED the tight fit. If I had my choice, I'd pick a tight "cooter" every time.
A bigger box to prevent premature arrivals? I prefer the male equivalent of the Kegals.
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